Campus Crusade for Christ’s Chicago Summer Project 2011
Day 40…sure, we’ll go with that…
My sincere apologies for the long absence…but we have been very busy…
I do have much to report…but first and foremost I want to share that a girl nicknamed Mush, who came to visit her friend who is here with us on project, accepted Christ as her personal Lord and Savior last night after the talk and worship! God is moving here—we are praising Him for the many spiritual conversations we’ve had, for the new relationships blossoming; for hearts softening and breaking open for Him—for new believers; for the many challenges which God uses to grow us and make us over more in His image, likeness, and shape us in the image of Christ—the sanctification. I apologize for the sporadic nature by which this update comes, but I am so excited and so pressed to get this information to you!
Philippians 3:14
Big things are going on here: Things much bigger than us. There is so much I want to convey but the enormity of them is overwhelming and I am at a loss for the words which could properly articulate what is happening. Thursday June 30th I had a meeting with my discipler. We discussed my ‘project job’. Our project jobs are the specific duties we are given in addition to our workplace and campus ministry and training. As we met I was nervous about what the job would be; nervous with hopes and anticipation. My discipler and I sat down to discuss…”Ops”, he said, would be my job. It wasn’t what I had assumed. I had calculated that my job would be outreach leader or action group leader. English Club (international bible study) leader at very least, I thought. Oh what pride. It disgusts me, I choke on it as it comes forth from my mouth; It makes me dizzy and ill to think about. That pride and self-centeredness: that sin revealed in my heart. It is true that sometimes the Gospel feels like sandpaper…as the Holy Spirit reveals sin so that God can deal with it. During these times we must remember that God loves us and this is why He reveals the sin: to show what Christ has paid for so that we may love Him more, and so that He can break us of it and sanctify us. Sometimes sanctification hurts. Sometimes God feels distant. As I am learning not to rely on feelings but always remember the promises of God, I must rejoice in that refinement, for though it may hurt, it makes me more like Christ.
It did not help that when I asked what the Ops job entailed, my discipler replied: “I did that job a couple years ago and I hated it, I dealt with money.” My instant thought was: “Putting me in charge of money is maybe the worst decision they could have made.” Then the evil one began his full-force attack, playing on every insecurity and lie I believe about myself. I began thinking: “these people don’t know me and they stuck me in a position because they had nothing else for me. They don’t think I’m capable they swept me under the rug.” These attacks from the evil one were coupled with my own sin. It became overwhelming.
Praise God that my discipler apologized for misspeaking and got me connected with Bacho and Kevin—the project directors—and they explained to me exactly what my job entails. They did not have to—and I certainly did not deserve it—but they were gracious enough to tell me why they gave me the job as well.
Operations’ job is to be the liaison for the Lofts, to make sure that the people who have jobs are doing well at those jobs, to meet with bosses and set up jobs/secure positions for next year, to compile documents on people’s work and general project experience(s), and write a letter that summarizes the project for the sake of staff and students (that particular part of the job is incredibly similar to what I did for the Jesus Film East Asia project last year). Money and budget are part of the job but not my job. They explained to me that this job is vital because it determines the future of the project. This job helps set up future projects. As Bacho said, even though it’s a behind the scenes job, it’s still very important. As David said, sometimes scholars and pastors are just doormen. Not that I am a scholar or pastor by any means, but the point is that just as Bacho said: every job has to be done. However, this job is very important. It’s not a doorman job. Yet, just as it says in 1 Corinthians 12:
12 For just as the body is one and has many members, and all the members of the body, though many, are one body, so it is with Christ. 13 For in one Spirit we were all baptized into one body—Jews or Greeks, slaves [4] or free—and all were made to drink of one Spirit.
14 For the body does not consist of one member but of many. 15 If the foot should say, “Because I am not a hand, I do not belong to the body,” that would not make it any less a part of the body. 16 And if the ear should say, “Because I am not an eye, I do not belong to the body,” that would not make it any less a part of the body. 17 If the whole body were an eye, where would be the sense of hearing? If the whole body were an ear, where would be the sense of smell? 18 But as it is, God arranged the members in the body, each one of them, as he chose. 19 If all were a single member, where would the body be? 20 As it is, there are many parts, [5] yet one body.
All the jobs, all the positions, are all very important. It is sin to think that any one job is more or less valuable or needed than another.
It blows my mind that in my finite understanding and foolish pride I think “If they want this project to do well wouldn’t they put the person with all this experience in these position(s).” What God was and is teaching me is that I am not my ministry. My identity, satisfaction, worth or value are not wrapped up in ministry, evangelism, leading bible study, or anything of those things. Those things are all in Christ. I know this truth, yet God is showing me, teaching me to trust Him with that in new circumstances. Moreover, as my friend Jordan said, “Chris, would you grow in those positions or would you be comfortable? You’d be comfortable. You can still lead, you can still do evangelism, you can still help with other things—but this position will grow you.” And it dawned on me by the grace of God, this truth: far be it for me to hinder anyone’s growth or prevent anyone’s opportunities. Furthermore, God is in charge and knows what’s best for all of us and this project in general. Further still, the project directors walk in the Spirit and have been praying for the project and going over our applications before we even got to project. They know us well. Bacho and Kevin were gracious enough to inform me as to why they gave me the position: because of my experience on past projects, my maturity (being the older guy on project), and my ability to form relationships—all these things gifts from God that He is using for His glory.
I have also been blessed to learn that I will get to use my ability/training/gifts as a writer in this position.
I’m blessed that I also get to play guitar and bass for the worship band—I play two nights a week.
Just think, I had my scope—my vision—so narrow and self-absorbed, that I almost missed all the blessings God was bestowing on me and all the work He is doing. Praise Him for turning me around—turning me back to Him.
Thursday July 6th we had our Chi-Time meeting—as we do every Thursday. However, this one was very different in that the project directors in fact turned project over to us the students!
I have been blessed to have some great conversations on campus and at work. I’ve been given the opportunity to visit some of the other campuses that this team works on. I got into a great conversation with some believers at University of Chicago, which was very encouraging. I got in a conversation with 3 atheists at the Illinois Institute of Technology. It’s crazy to see how God is so sovereign and ordains these conversations because one was from England, one from the Middle East, and one from China (where I’ve done ministry before). The focus, however, turned to Gareth—the Englishman. We had great conversation in which God used me to speak truth into his life. As it turned out we are both into many of the same things and were able to converse and relate there. When we did not agree, I let him talk and I listened, speaking truth when appropriate. God brought us to the last question, which He told me to modify. So I asked them bluntly, “Who is Jesus?” He said he had no idea and even no idea if Jesus Christ ever really existed. This was when God used the apologetics knowledge and other knowledge He has blessed me with for His glory. God brought to my memory information about the validity and trustworthiness of scripture and from there, share the Gospel. I was able to recommend some documentaries for him (as that was one of the things he and I shared interest in). My hope is that this conversation got Gareth thinking and moved him from a -9 atheist to maybe a -7. My hope is that God eventually breaks Gareth’s heart for the Lord.
God also positioned me to become friends with a guy at work named Jose. He was raised in a Christian home but is not a believer. God has given me a spirit that puts Jose at ease. He says he is able to feel comfortable around me, that I’m ‘good people’. This is a gift from God. Another gift from God is that we take the same way home from work. Jose has shared with me that his father and his friend were both killed. He shared many of his thoughts and concerns and troubles with me. God allowed me to be a comfort (I hope). I invited him to our Chi-Time meeting and hope he follows through as he said he would like to hang out.
Prayer Requests:
-That I would do my job well
-That I would do my project job well
-For more opportunities to share the Gospel at work and on campus
-For the ministry in general
-That Jose would come to Chi-Time
-For Gareth
-For Jose
…that they come to know the Lord.
Praises:
-Michelle accepting Christ!!
-Growing fellowship
-God’s sanctification and refinement of me and others here
-God showing me my sin and correcting me.
-For God’s grace
-Many great spiritual conversations
-God’s work here
